You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Randomize
