I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
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