This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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