I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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