I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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