I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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