I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
