Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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