Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
