I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize