i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize