You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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