Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Randomize