I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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