i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize