i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
