Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
