this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
