there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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