Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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