I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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