if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
