im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
