i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
