did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
