Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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