What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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