so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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