i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
