Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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