soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
