I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
