I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
