I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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