I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
