Screwed.edu
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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