it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
