I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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