If you die in college, do you die in real life?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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