yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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