dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
