i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
only you would photoshop your dick
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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