in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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