I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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