How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
