dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
