I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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