Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
