if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
