Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
